“I’m exhausted by this!”
Why this is a wall:
Psychedelics tax the body. Whether it’s your serotonin being drained or the neural networks being rewired or the physical effects of hours of intense experiences, your body/brain/ego/self/spirit will emerge from the journey pretty knackered. This can drain you of the life forces you need to tend to the big things you received, at least for awhile. The consciousness we tapped into may be unlimited, but our bodies most certainly have limits.
And then there’s the exhaustion that’s less about the drug’s effects on our physicality and more about the enormity of what we now face. Psychedelic trips can be as vague as they are profound. Rarely if ever do we get a single clear mandate about how we’re to live after a journey. Instead, we typically get a host of insights, visions, messages, metaphors, revelations, desires, traumas, pains, fears, and joys that can swirl around our consciousness like an existential dust devil. Competing for our attention and confusing us with their endless complexity, we can struggle to “make sense” of the turbulence, and we can easily tire of the toil needed to feel like we are getting clarity with any of it. And even our gratitude for what we have received can feel conflicted because it sits alongside the fervent need to just make it stop. So yeah, transformation fatigue is real. But it’s okay. You’re tired after a good long hike, right? Same same.
Potential ladders:
Rest. Nutrition. Fluids. Exercise. Breathing. Tend the body. Give yourself permission to be exhausted. You don’t have to earn rest—it’s your right and your duty to take care of the meat sack you live in. Listen to your body—it knows what it needs.
Picking just one thing per day. We can overwhelm ourselves by flitting from one epiphany to the next, furiously switching our already smartphone-strained attention from that insight about our core self to that realization about our partner’s love to that childhood trauma we endured to our work life dissatisfactions to passions we let atrophy to massive realizations about the universe, and so on and so on. Quit it. Focus and stillness are your friends here. You will lose nothing by restricting your attention to that one thing that’s arisen in your consciousness when you wake up and letting that be the focus of your day, or maybe even several days. Try to reinforce that insight in small, sustainable ways to prevent an “all-or-nothing” mindset. You can do this by identifying one small, daily action that aligns with chosen focus. Example 1: If you realized in medicine that you need more self-love, place a hand on your heart and say a kind word to yourself each morning. Example 2: If you saw in medicine the value of connection and how much you crave it, send a simple message of appreciation to a friend once a day. As you focus, resist the temptation layer, stack, group, or rank your one thing relative all the other things—just let that one thing be the singular jewel you will behold, or perhaps the cave you want to dwell in for a bit. Give it the attention it deserves, and the overhelm will subside and be replaced by focus and calm, maybe even some clarity. And trust that those other things you’re not focused on today aren’t going anywhere and will be waiting for you tomorrow. The goal is not to overhaul your life overnight but to build self-trust in the changes you’re integrating. One thing at a time.
Ritualizing daily grounding through breathwork, body scanning, laying down or walking barefoot on the earth, sitting in water, taking a steam or sauna—anything that connects you with fundamental forces and stillness. Do one of those things every day.
Regulating your nervous system with techniques like gentle stretching, yoga, running, drumming, singing, acupuncture, massage, vagus nerve stimulation, etc. Whatever works for you, do it, daily.
Creating/finding a safety anchor. Locate a memory, image, object, or sensation you can return to when the overwhelm arises. Keep it nearby and ready to deploy. As soon as the need arises, hold the item either in your consciousness or in your hand. Let it return you to that place/space/time where your body knew it was safe and well held. Let that feeling wash over you and sit with it as long as you can. Breathe. Relax your muscles. Maybe even smile. You are okay.